To My Partner Ash

Celestial Bodies portrait of my partner Ash

By @ewmikehunt on Instagram

I've been waiting for a love like this

This softness, this quiet queer joy

The way you swim with ease

Through my thoughts

My mind drowns

In the possibility of you and me

But my hands are an ocean

Push you out

Pull you back in

Tender hearted

Carefully guarded

The process of love already started 

I'm a locked fortress

And you hold the keys

Sweet sentiments flow freely

Through my thoughts

But yield at my lips

I bite my tongue and refrain

From confessing

My deep affection for you

My fear says no

But everything else is

A resounding YES

I’m scared because the truth is

That we’re good together

We might actually work

Your heart has stolen my silence

Torn apart the mask I hide under

You make me forget

That I’m not ready for love

I want to jump right into your arms

Jump into something real 

But I can’t

I fear going mad for you

Infatuation or mental illness

How am I to distinguish the two?

I need to step slowly

Into your embrace

Even though I'm cautious

I like the way you feel

I didn't want these feelings

But here

I’ve got them

Handle with care

I will let love unwind my twisted heart

Overflow my fractured, aching soul

Start a new chapter with you as coauthor

I want to collaborate

And create love with you

I want to walk this dream

Hand in hand

Even though I still sleep

Wishing for death

I wake to the sun rising

On you every day

You smooth my rough edges over

Shine your beautiful smile

Through my tears just the same

Make me feel alive when the world

Gives me nothing but pain

I want you to cling to me

Like you've loved me forever

I want to immortalize you

With my words

Step off the precipice

And take the plunge

Paint Taurus + Gemini

Across the stars

Souls don’t speak

Yet ours do fluently

I don't believe in soulmates

But I believe in you

I think that we might actually work

So here is my letter to you

Signed and stamped with a kiss

I love you

I've been waiting for a love like this

Let’s do this fucking thing

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